Me VS. Me

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My younger self was very different to my current self. I was the kind of person who would sit in solitude to ponder upon the state of humanity and the future of the human race. I would host internal debates regarding the validity of world peace as a real concept and the animalistic nature of some cultures. In simple, I was a lot deeper than I am now. There was more of me than there is now in the sense that there was a lot more that lay beneath the surface. Now, I find myself glowing, warm, and full of light. Instead of escaping to be alone, I seek the company of those whom carry a golden light in their hearts and souls, and those whom question my questions.

Growing up, I’ve found that I let myself become burdened by the darkness and pains of those around me, but now, now that I know myself and all that I am, I feel as light as a feather. My self-help guides apply to me before you and on that note, I want to share with you all a letter that I wrote to myself a few years back:

Dear future me,

You are stronger than you think, trust me. You’ve been through worse, and you’ve survived. There’s not a chance in hell you won’t survive whatever it is you’re going through now.

Don’t tell everyone your story. Not everyone will care. Tell the ones you’ve decided to trust with your life. Tell the ones you know won’t see you any differently because of it. Don’t tell the ones who will throw you a pity party, that’s not what you are. You are a strong, and independent, young woman who knows that to survive, you need to keep going.

Keep your head up. No matter what your past holds, it no longer matters. Anyone who brings it up as a battlefield deserves to be walked out on. You do not need to justify yourself to anyone but your Lord.

Make friends worth keeping. If they make you feel like shit, they aren’t your friends, you are their ego boost. Don’t make friends who just agree with you – if you wanted that, you could have bought yourself a parrot and saved yourself the emotional grief.

Love yourself. Don’t make the mistake of your past self. Learn from it, and love yourself.

Your scars, both internal and external, are proof that you are capable of survival. You do not need someone to complete you. If one day you find someone who complements you, great, but don’t you dare, let someone complete you. You’ve not come so far, to have your life dictated by yet another male.

Love yourself before you love him. Take care of yourself before you take care of him.

You are your own person. You do not belong to anyone but your Lord. Don’t ever let anyone convince you otherwise.

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